Thursday, February 24, 2011

Is It Possible To Train My Son To Be The Perfect Man?

We always hear Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus - you know, men and women are inherently different and that's just the way it is. 

So here's a novel idea... what if I were to train my son to be the Perfect Man?  Could that work???

I'm talking about teaching him things (to name a few) like:
  • acting with perfect gentleman-like manners (you know, to be "courtly")
  • to put the toilet seat down (and not pee on the seat)
  • not burping or farting in public
  • knowing he doesn't always have to be right
  • putting his dirty clothes in the hamper
  • putting his dirty dishes in the dishwasher (and maybe unloading it too)
  • knowing the general concept of cleaning and making a bed
  • how to react in the perfect way to a female mood swing
  • listening without trying to solve all of your problems (and no selective hearing!)
  • asking for directions
  • not putting an empty juice/milk container back in the fridge
  • leaving hair/toothpaste in the sink/tub (or sharing my towel - yuck!)
  • sharing the TV remote
  • not procrastinating
And one more big one for sure... the one that inspired this post.  Teaching him not to objectify women - to learn to appreciate them for the person they are inside, and not just the outside. 

We were out for brunch on Sunday and the topic of who my son thought was cute in his kindergarten class came up.  My husband jokingly said to him,  "Just wait, when you get a bit older, we'll have fun ranking chicks" and I was like "NO WAY"!  I know it was all in jest, but the reality is, men learn it somewhere.  Now, just a quick note in case any of you want to attack my husband, he truly loves women (me in  particular ;-0 ) but he does always notice beautiful women and can sometimes suffer from a little whiplash if they pass by too quickly.  He's the most loyal human I have ever met so I have no problem AT ALL with him looking.  But it does get annoying that he sometimes gets fixated on looks.

I'm not going to fully discount looks and the role they plays in relationships.  A romantic relationship requires physical attraction, otherwise it's just a friendship.  No sexual chemistry, no lasting marriage.  I think generally speaking, men are much more shallow when it comes to looks than women (i.e. the movie Shallow Hal).  Obviously, some women get much more fixated by dollar signs, but that's another whole post entirely!

So back to my original thought...can I teach my son to be what women want - can he become the Perfect Man?  The whole nurture vs nature debate.  Surely some of the more task-oriented items on the list can be conquered.  But will societal pressure be too much to conquer?  I'm so far not doing to well on the whole toilet seat issue, so who knows?!?  I do know one thing, if I did succeed, I'd have a few VERY thankful young women one day!

My beautiful boy...

6 comments:

  1. From what I hear about your Husband; he is the quintessential gentleman.

    Puts himself before others and has the Highest regard for women.

    Its too bad you can't write an article on how to train your husband to be like yours!!

    That would be a great trick- seems mine is a prick

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  2. Hmmm... honey is that your comment?

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  3. you are hilarious. first time on your blog. Your boy is gorgeous. I love the list you have going. You are a great mom!

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  4. Thanks Emily! I haven't written much here as I am writing for my work blog now - you can check out my latest posts on www.shatobu.com!

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  6. JUNE 1st marked Ten years of our marriage.I am absolutely in love with this man.We both meet why in work place Love found its way through the highways and byways of the world.And we made a family out of it! We have beautiful twin babies together.I am so happy to live in a world where so many people of different backgrounds and cultures can build a life together,But over the last few months his attitude changed over me and my kids it was unbearable for me and I wonder how...and I contact Dr OKORO, of okorohomeofrefuge@gmail.com for advice and help....and today my pain &sorrows are over My husband is back to stay forever,I am grateful &thanks to Dr OKORO...private email okorohomeofrefuge@gmail.com

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